What to Do When I'm Gone: A Mother's Wisdom to Her Daughter

By Suzy Hopkins

Book Overview

Suzy Hopkins's and Hallie Bateman's new book, What to Do When You Get Dumped, comes out in January 2025 and is available for pre-order now

A mother's advice to her daughter-a guide to daily living, both practical and sublime-with full-color illustrations throughout.

One sleepless night while she was in her early twenties, illustrator/writer Hallie Bateman had a painful realization: her mom would die, and after she died she would be gone. The prospect was devastating, and also scary-how would she navigate the world without the person who gave her life? She thought about all the motherly advice she would miss-advice that could help her through the challenges to come, including the ordeal of losing a parent.

The next day, Hallie asked her mother, writer Suzy Hopkins, to record step-by-step instructions for her to follow in the event of her mom's death. The list began: "Pour yourself a stiff glass of whiskey and make some fajitas" and continued from there, walking Hallie through the days, months, and years of life after loss, with motherly guidance and support, addressing issues great and small--from choosing a life partner to baking a quiche. The project became a way for mother and daughter to connect with humor, openness, and gratitude. It led to this book.

Combining Suzy's wit and heartfelt advice with Hallie's quirky and colorful style, What to Do When I'm Gone is the illustrated instruction manual for getting through life without one's mom. It's also a poignant look at loss, love, and taking things one moment at a time. By turns whimsical, funny, touching, and above all pragmatic, it will leave readers laughing and teary-eyed. And it will spur conversations that enrich family members' understanding of one another.

• Format: Hardcover
• Language: English
• ISBN: 1632869683
• ISBN13: 9781632869685
• Release Date: April 2018
• Publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing
• Length: 144 Pages
• Weight: 1.33 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.7" x 6.7" x 8.8"

Customer Reviews

Beautiful & pivotal book on grief and healing after the loss of a parent

I absolutely adored this graphic novel about what to do after a parent or parent-figure dies. The book is written from the perspective of the parent who has died and gives gentle instructions for the child on how to move forward in life, while living with grief and loss. It's a book about learning to live with grief. The focus is on mental and emotional health after a loss. This is not an instructional guide on the paperwork, legal, or financial matters that will need to be taken care of. There are many books that address those topics, this is not one of them. What I love about this book is that it is not only written like a letter to the child after a parent's loss, but it demonstrates that even when people we love die, our relationship with them does not. It carries on through our memories, our thoughts, our love, and in ways we will never truly understand. It's a beautiful and deeply relational book and I highly recommend it, as an experienced librarian and end-of-life doula.

Not what I expected.

Disappointed..wanted to return book and website would not work. Called customer service...no help at all. I am not a happy customer right now. I do not recommend this book.