I Hate Valentine's Day

By Bennett Madison

Whether single, dating, married, or divorced, the dreaded February 14 arrives each year to ambush our self-esteem. No other 24-hour period convinces otherwise happy folk that they're in fact social pariahs. But now comes protection from the ritual onslaught of Auden's 12 Songs, saccharine cards, and suffocating expectations. I HATE VALENTINE'S DAY is a bitingly funny guide to getting through the Big Day painlessly, including tips on people and places it's best to avoid ('Indulge your chain restaurant cravings because no one will (or should) be celebrating at Harvesters'), ways to take your mind off being single ('Dress up like an exiled member of the royal family who has hit the skids'), and last-resort measures ('Invent a long-distance relationship'). I HATE VALENTINE'S DAY charts a welcome path back to the innocent days of candy hearts.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0689873727
• ISBN13: 9780689873720
• Release Date: December 2004
• Publisher: Simon Spotlight Entertainment
• Length: 128 Pages
• Weight: 0.35 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.4" x 4.9" x 7.0"

Customer Reviews

I love Valentine's Day--and this book!

I'm an extremely romantic type who will probably never marry, have children, or even have a serious boyfriend. According to a test in this book, I was almost the type who "cries at TV commercials", who should've put the book back and gotten a refund. Thing is, I borrowed this book yesterday from the Flushing Library (Queens, NY), and I've almost read all of it. Bennett Madison's book is full of tongue-in-cheek (almost) advice about rethinking Valentine's Day's meaning, and, failing that, landing a "V-Date" for that fateful day, and surviving that date. He also includes advice about Valentine's Day gifts and cards (no stuffed animals, says he!), and other paraphernalia. From my POV, the first two chapters, "Where Did Our Love Go?" and "Rethinking Valentine's Day", should be taken seriously. His very first line in Chapter 1 is, "Remember when Valentine's Day was fun?" He gives the same advice that I received from a college counselor nearly 30 years ago: basically, to expand one's definition of love beyond the narrow confines of romantic coupling. Similiar to the book Unplug the Christmas Machine, this book challenges the reader to recall the childhood enjoyment of the holiday and recognize when and how "it went wrong". I supposed I have a love-hate relationship with V-Day, though I mostly love it. After reading I Hate Valentine's Day, you might teach yourself to love it, too, or keep hating the day--your choice.

The hilarious truth about Valentines Day

The perfect book for anyone who is a little cynical about Feb. 14th. Awesome present for college/young adult age. Madison tells it like it is about the horrible chocolate, the high expectations and those damn conversation hearts. Deffinetly something I will read every valentines day!